Pick a private and comfortable setting where both you and the other person can talk openly without distractions or time constraints. Ensure that you both have enough time to discuss the matter thoroughly.

Approach the conversation with honesty. Use clear and straightforward language to explain your diagnosis. Avoid blaming or accusing the other person, as STIs can happen to anyone.

Be well-informed about your STI. Understand how it spreads, symptoms, treatment options, and prevention methods.

Acknowledge the other person's feelings and concerns. Show empathy and understanding towards their emotions, and be prepared for a range of reactions. Reassure them that you are there to support them through the process.

Offer reassurance that you are taking responsible steps for your health, getting treatment and following your healthcare provider's advice.

Encourage the other person to ask questions and express their thoughts and feelings. Listen actively and without judgement. Open dialogue can help both parties process the situation and work together to find solutions.

Let the other person know that you are there to support them throughout the testing and treatment process. Emotional support is as crucial as practical assistance.

Talk about prevention methods, such as practising safe sex, using protection, and regular STI screenings. Emphasise the importance of being proactive about sexual health to prevent future incidents.

Here’s a message you could use to start the conversation : 

“Hi, this is tricky, but I've been diagnosed with [name of STI] which means you should get tested too, even without symptoms. I'm here to answer any questions.” 

It’s vital that all sexual activity is consensual, safe and supportive. If you have been in a situation that has made you feel unsafe and you would like to get some help, we recommend visiting TOAH-NNEST for assistance.